Power Struggles

“Terrible two’s”, how many of us have heard this phrase. I cant tell you how many times I’ve had parents blame the “terrible two’s” for just about everything. Even when looked up, I found that Google’s definition is “a period in a child’s early social development (typically around the age of two years) that is associated with defiant or unruly behavior.” Although it may be so, young children are always trying to see how far they can go and do as they wish. Power struggles and unruly behavior should not be as common as it is. A child should have freedom! If the child feels free, he will be much more compliant and less stressed. 

I know what you’re thinking, you want me to let my child do whatever he/she wants?! No. That is not at all what I am saying, quite the contrary actually. I am saying you are the adult, you are the one directing this child on the task they are about to perform. It is solely up to you how you want the end product to be. I understand that some days you just cant avoid a meltdown because YOU picked the wrong shoes for their outfit, or because YOU are ending outside playtime. 

I have learned to give my kids choices, this will give them the feeling of respect. I also try to give my kids as much routine as possible to avoid any out of the ordinary fits. Getting ready in the mornings can be tough, so try to plan as much as you can with them the night before. Keep them in the loop about breakfast the next morning, have them help pick out two outfits they can choose from in the morning. Limit the amount of decisions that have to be made in the morning to keep everything running smoother. Set the timer for how long they must brush their teeth or when breakfast is over. These little things will work wonders, I promise!

Always remember, your child is your child, but they are individuals. Each child has their own personality in the making, their own likes, dislikes, and even pet peeves. When children know they are respected, they will be less likely to give you a hard time.